Night Oh Worship

So... i am already in the full swing of life here in Georgia.  So much so that i have a class that starts tomorrow at 8:00 IN THE MORNING. :(  I know, some of you reading this have job's and are up much earlier then that and have to be at your place of work much earlier but i just got back, so my body is a little slow right now.  Although i feel that i am adjusting to the time zone fairly well.

Any who today i went to lunch with Luke at Moe's and conveniently left my wallet at my house (i really forgot it) so he had to pay for my meal.  hahah, i felt so bad.  Then after that we went to the pool and so i jumped and jumped and jumped... and jumped and jumped and jumped well over fifty times from this one diving board trying to do a gainer, and accomplishing nothing, not even a half spin.  I felt so defeated doing the same thing over and over again.  Then before i tried doing the 51st jump a guy at the pool we were at pretty much said i was too fat to be jumping off the diving board that was just replaced.  I mean not in those words but he pretty much said it.  So that was lame and then we went to my pool and i felt sooo sooo defeated and eventually gave up after Foxy momma and Luke went to get ready for the Night of Worship at Buckhead Church.  So i gave up, defeated and just angry at myself.

Now some of you may be thinking Paul, it is a hard trick, don't beat yourself up, and to that i say... I have done the flip before, i am just...scared.  I hate to admit it, i have commitment issues.  I hate being frightened of things.  So pretty much i was mad at myself and still a little disappointed.  I knew though the Devil was using this feeling of disappointment to get me away from where i needed to be personally to worship corporately that night.

So as i went home a little angry i got ready met Luke and Foxy and left for the Night of Worship.  We got to the church and went inside and this one lady was telling us where there was space left and she said something that i didn't here and then i heard "or you can go in the front to the mosh pit." (the word mosh seems like it isn't spelt right, apple seems to think not at least)  Any way's i thought to myself, what a disrespect of worship and this spirt of judgment came over me and it seemed that i was becoming consumed with pointing out things here and there and as we got to our seats i just sat down and prayed.  I prayed that God would remove this feeling of disappointment, of judgment and of bitterness.  There is a lot of stuff going on in my life and i knew i couldn't fully worship God the way he desires, with everything in me, unless i came to him in my state of sin and filth and just asked him to cleanse me.  As I sat through a song or two God worked within me and gave me this spirit of freedom from all of that garbage and junk that i have been carrying around for awhile and all that new junk that was just added on that day.

I love how are savior frees us time and time again from all sorts of struggles. :)

The last thing i want to say is this, it is something that i realized almost four years ago, and that is this... Music goes beyond words and knowledge.  It affects the body and mind and spirit in some amazing and unreal ways.  God moved me through this worship to tears of joy and just awe as i soaked up his love.  It was amazing to have one of the guys lead a song in spanish as the words came out in both spanish and english.  The place exploded with God's love.  God is beautiful and he was in that place, showering us with love as we sang with hearts abandoned to him.  The body of Christ was truly edified through this time tonight, through prayer and through song.

God... is... Good!