A Taste

Today as YEC ended it's first session of the first something amazing happened, people made some amazing decisions with God. People came to Christ for the first time, recommitted, and decided many other things.

I think it was quite amazing and my only thought that consumed my mind was that i was being a part of something amazing. Literally as Brock Gill finished up his talk after some amazing and death defying illusions, hundreds of kids poured out of the stands and seats to come and make commitments and covenants with their Lord. It was so beautiful.

As i saw the space we had designated for all of this fill up it was so moving, emotions just welling up inside waiting to explode. All i could think about was just praising God and my thoughts were "Amen. Amen. Amen!"

And as i ran through the area full of people making sure things were ready for the night i felt as if i was going in slow motion. I felt, as i answered questions and helped others, that i was getting a taste of what is to come. I just felt like this is what i was going to be a part of. I felt that God was allowing me to see the joy that He has set up. I felt that i had nothing to offer but my heavenly pops had everything under control. I know that i have nothing, but it was such a blessing to experience this joy with others, this new experience, and watching peoples eyes be unveiled to God's beauty.

I need God more then God needs me. That phrase is very prevalent and very humbling in my life right now. I really do think i was given a taste of joy and a taste of my future of what is to come.

Amen. Amen Amen!

Following Dad

This blog post isn't what it seems.

Not to go into any detail really, if you want to know more about this post... just ask and i will give you the 411.

Just know that i am following Dad in where he leads me and with what he is showing me.  A hard decision was made today, but it was a decision made that makes it so i don't go halfsies on Dad.

I want to follow him completely wherever and however he leads me.  I am excited to see how by saying no to an opportunity the doors he will open and the experiences he will allow me to have.

FTS 3 Years Running

So some of you may not know this but i am best friends with Frosty The Snowman.

I mean we only see each other once a year for the Eastsides Christmas play but we get through those long periods of silence and love each other regardless.

Yah, me and him are pretty tight, just check out some of these pictures.

My 6th Grade Boys

So i am leading a small group of sixth grade boys.  They are pretty rockin.  We meet as a small group for North Metro Church at their middle school gathering on Wednesdays called Sublime.  It is an awesome time.

It is funny to see how the size of my group changes so drastically from week to week but also to see how in depth my boys go from time to time.  There has been a lot of growth in this fall semester and it will be interesting to see how God rocks their and my world.  I am excited to be their small group leader and to see where God leads us.

I plan on staying with these guys as long as i can.

But more importantly... on to the pictures below.  On the last Sublime of the semester we had a joint meeting with both high school and middle school students.  It was a great time where God spoke to the students in some huge ways.  Also, it was in December so as a small group challenge they said the groups would get 100 points for every student and leader in the group wearing a tacky christmas sweater... so my boys forgot their sweaters but luckily i brought some extras so we could get a total of 400 points.  I mean i am pretty excited about it.  And so, without further waiting... here are some pictures.

This is a picture of what God is laying on students heart.

Absolutely beautiful and amazing. 

This is probably one of the sexiest men alive... Joe Shelton

And these guys, they are MY BOYS!

These are just some of the guys that are unreal.

Serving Whine

I realized today that serving and complaining, yah, they just don't go together.

I find myself serving at times and just complaining the whole way through.  Or better yet, i will find i am serving and in the right state of mind and then i look over and complain about someone else who isn't working as hard or who i think has just come to help so they can look good in front of others.

How selfish am i to think that i know the reasons behind peoples methods, and whether my guess of another individual is serving so they can look better is correct, it doesn't matter.  Not because i am supposed to mind my own business but because they are doing a part in helping others.  Sure it may not be for the right purposes but it is not for me to judge.  It is for me to encourage because God can use our selfish sinful actions for his glory if he chooses.

I know that sounds a little sketch God using our selfish and sinful actions, but it is true.  God is in control of all things and can bring out beauty in our shame, and can bring out love in our selfishness.

But back to the beginning.  I was helping a friend today carry a box.  I thought we were both going to be carrying a box but it turns out he just wanted me to help him.  So i was carrying a box that was decently heavy all by myself.  Also, it wasn't like i had to move it from one room to another, i had to walk all the way around the inside of the church and then walk around the building and a even a little bit further to get to the parking lot that he had parked in.  From the beginning of getting the box i had complained and whines from time to time.  Half way through this ordeal i realized that one, the guy i was helping always helps me without complaining and two, what good is my help if i am whining?  What good is my help if i really don't love this guy? What good is my help if I whine while serving?  My help is nothing.

You pick that up, my help means nothing if i whine while serving.  When i whine, it certainly isn't benefiting me and i know it may only hurt the other person.

So as i finished carrying the box i just kinda shut up and walked on, and even still i made a sarcastic comment or two i think.  This whole story to say, that i really do want to be a man of love, service and sacrifice, and the only way i can even begin to grow to be that kinda man is giving all of me for all of Him.  Giving all of me and serving with no whining.  Giving all of me and giving up my comforts and all of myself to live love to YOU and others.

I bring nothing

As i have stated before God is changing my heart for missions and traveling around serving others.  God is breaking my heart for what breaks his and giving me a BHAG that only he can accomplish.  And i realize my weakness and that only God can accomplish what he wants me to do.  I realize that with his power and with his leading that i can and will do anything.

But i found myself praying the other day, "Help me bring joy, help me bring peace, help me bring comfort to those in need.  God as you bring me to these places help me bring..."  And i realized and caught myself halfway through this prayer, that i bring nothing.  That i have nothing to give.  That i don't honestly do a thing, but God allows me to witness what he has already brought to other places around the world.

I think it is pretty selfish and pretty arrogant of us to think that God hasn't already been to certain areas of the world.  Missionaries are always saying we are going to bring God to these places.  No you are not.  I hate to mention this but he is already there in those places doing amazing things.  he is just waiting for us to go.  So as i was praying i realized and remembered that God is the creator of all things, and i can only give because he gave me whatever it is that i am giving.  

You following along, or is this clear as mud?

So i realized that as God brings me around the world i get to partake in the joy, peace, and laughter of those that are already there.  I get to partake in the sadness, hurt, and pain that is already there.  I also get the privilege of opening peoples eyes... the ones that are sad, the ones that are in hurting, the ones that are in pain to see the joy, peace and laughter that is really there in front of them.

I bring nothing.  I only get the honor of experiencing what is already there, and opening peoples eyes to what the devil and his demons have blinded them from.

Searching

It seems i am searching for something.

It seems that i am supposed to be learning something.

I find myself looking on the internet at nothing in-particular for long periods of time when i could be filling my mind with knowledge and could be trying hard in school... Yet i just search.

I seem to be searching for worth in many thing from people, girls, drums... These are the things that come to mind right now, but i am pretty sure in thinking more on this, my world would be utterly shattered as i discover what i am putting my worth into.

It seems as i look for worth in other places, i am missing the big picture.  I am missing the fact that my worth is not found in others or in other things, but in God alone.  I realize God wants to bless me with many things, but i put my worth into these blessings instead of the giver of those blessings.

I am lost, searching for God knows what. ( I say that literally not like taking his name in vain)

I know my worth is in him, but i seem to be searching.  Searching for words, actions, conversations, people.  I am just...

Searching.

I AM Wii FIT

I love Wii Fit, it is sooo stinkin cool.  My brother has had it for awhile now, but i have now just started playing it, and it is unreal to me.

I must say that i am becoming Wii Fit.

Now before you mock me and laugh at this post, realize this, that it has work outs that actually work your body and tone it up.  I mean i woke up this morning with sore chest and abs.  Can any other gaming system do that to yah. Huh... HUH!?!

But seriously, this game is amazing, and i just think you all should know.

My heart is changing

One of the prayers that i have had for the longest time now, well really since preparing for Alaska, has been that God would open my ears and eyes to the joys and struggles around me.

As i wake up each morning i try and remember to ask for that and for God to break my heart for what break his.

Now, a slight change in thinking, but it will all connect.  Any who, for the longest time my heart has been hooked to ministry, more specifically speaking and traveling around doing that.  I mean eventually i would love to be either a youth or a lead pastor of a church, but still having the ability to travel around for three months out of the year to go speak at other events.  You may be thinking that is a little crazy, but my ministry just isn't within the church i am with.  Any who, that desire of ministry has expanded to own my own missions organization setting up service projects around the world, and this desire of mine deserves a whole other blog, but ask me about it and i will gladly tell you.

All of that to come to the title of the blog.  My heart is changing.  More correctly stated, it is expanding.  God is breaking my heart for what breaks his and that is to do missions.  I so desire to travel the world serving God rockin it for him.  In praying about it and him growing me in this passion i feel a very clear message.  That message is to get out of this debt that i have incurred and he will send me wherever he desires me to go.

I am excited to see where God is leading me and to where i will serve.  I know and hope that i will be serving people around where i live, which would include my family, but also others in this general area around me.  And i can't wait to serve miles away from where i live, like maybe even Africa.

Again, i am just pumped and excited to see where God is taking me and to see how he will continually prepare for where he wants me to go.

Turkey Day!

I am pretty pumped that my family is here for Turkey day.  They came last night and we made some good Indian food and some good old sghetti (spaghetti) with sauce with sausage.

As last night came to an end we stayed up playing Settlers of Catan till 2 a.m. and it was great. hahah, that game is just so good.  If you want, i will teach you how to play.

Any who, back to Turkey Day.  Everyone is making their own special dishes of food.  I am making desserts such as home-made reeses cups, blueberry pie, and that is about it.  But one of my brothers is making deviled eggs, getting some sushi maybe, and we are just having some great food.  I am stinkin loving it.  Oh i love food and turkey day.

Well that is all... for now.  I know this was brief but i am not fully focused so maybe it was a good thing.  Peace out and A-Town Down.